The weather is incredibly weird … we’re in mid-summer and we have the fire going! Yesterday was calm and sunny; birds chirping and shit … and today it’s pissing down, gale force winds and freezing cold!
The silver lining is the rain … I love the rain <3
My partner returned last night and I think he’s a little shocked at how much I enjoyed my ‘alone time’ … he is presently sulking and has gone off to ‘buy something’; his parting remark was … ‘enjoy your space’.
Oh well …
I was pleased to have him home … but more pleased that I had gotten a few days to myself. And when my mind had settled and I was able to have a few clear thoughts, I renewed my ‘to-do slash goals’ list with shit that was a little more realistic and would assist with the long-term stuff.
I’ve included a ‘short drive’, just round the block or up the road, as a weekly thing. I figure if I can ease into it and try it in a safe place then it might become easier as I go along … ??? Heres hoping … and I figure I can’t do myself or anyone else much damage round here ;)
I’ve also gone back to doing yoga. The reasoning being; to strengthen my rather lame self, so I’m actually capable of the ‘more’ that I want to do. As it stands at the moment, I spend more time ‘staring at the ceiling’, and No I haven’t manage to pierce any holes in it from my Superwoman eyes :)
But after 2 days of minimal yoga, I realised my muscles are so tense its no wonder my anxiety levels have been shooting left right and centre … but more amusing than anything … was struggling through a few down ward facing dogs, which are looking more like rigamortis-ised road kill; and feeling like I had been steam rolled; and backed up on! Not cool.
But I persevere … I want to drive … go out for dinner and get shit faced … get to my Art Collective …
Really, I want my Independence back.
Maybe that’s what intimidates the partner??? ;)