ruminating on the demise of the pedo cunt

this has been swirling around the grey matter for a few days. since the conversation with my girl.

i haven’t let it effect me too much. so thats either progress, or dissociation or both lol.

i found out the pedo cunt has yet another victim. not surprising really.

there is a strange thing that happens though, in the psyche of the victim(s) of pedo cunts generally. we tend to believe, or come to believe, that we are the only ones. i think this is in part due to the disbelief that their sickness is indeed a sickness … like a disease, it spreads. we tend to believe that (maybe thats for preservation of our own sanity, I’m unsure) their deeds must have been a one off; that they couldn’t have possibly gone around fiddling with everything in sight and no-one notice it.

through my studies though, i gleaned that the average offender will have racked up a cool 20+ victims in the course of an average lifetime. these are minimal stats. the true representation is far higher, given that the average offender may have started in their teens and die in their 60s. most of these are unreported.

but these stats alone are revolting.

so back to the pedo cunt at hand.

turns out a neighbours son had quite a bit to do with him. enough time spent for the pedo cunt to introduce this child (7 at the time) to sadistic pornography. if anything else was done to the child, this has yet to be disclosed.

if anything was done to his siblings; this is also unknowen.

the likelihood of the pedo cunt having only picked 1 of the siblings for his loathsome pleasures is unlikely.

this leaves me wondering – how the fuck does the universe let this revolting human live on? why?

on a more realistic note however; it makes the idea of outing him completely and utterly, a likely scenario, to commence very soon.

i won’t dwell on it to much here. at the moment.

i can’t.

i just needed to get it out of my head.

these eyes

these eyes have seen


there and here.

crimson fog

orange hue.

glazed, yet glassy. moving

through the halls

down the stairs.

noting the darkness surrounds


the smoke in the air

the spoons on the stove

the oil dripping

from the caps.

no food in the darkness,

but bottles and bottles.

of tears

of piss

of losses

of pills

the haze it follows

her. me.

through the dark.

fuck 1

fuck 2

fuck 3

it makes no difference.

a woman once was.

her womb a sacred store house.


slaughtered and wretched.

and she passes dem pipes


watching them inhale


their lives.

but no high

no low.

just sweet balance.

tranquil balance.

tomorrow, she will shit not.

too constipated to care.

to heavy.

eventually wiping her ass

hole on yesterdays news.

and no food.

just drink.

no touch

just invasion.


sweet balance.

have these eyes

seen to many.


to readjust

in the light.

to remember.

is to smell.

to feel.

to weep.


are held in

these eyes



First Published on: Jun 20, 2016 @ 00:07 ❤


Metiria Turei, Greens co-leader resigned last night.

Metiria Turei, the Green Party co-leader, resigned yesterday. There’s a long twisted witch hunt that preludes this; you can Google it. I won’t give it any air time.

This has been my response.

Yep, this is a long one. Yes its Metiria Turei related. Not Sorry.

Theres an extremely awkward sadness slash frustration in the air today. I can feel it in my puku and my chest. Think it’s actually grief, boarder lining on rage.
I haven’t weighed in on the Metiria Turei debacle and resignation … sometimes it takes a little while to process shit like this.
I watched her live interview the other day; where she had rapid fire questions thrown at her and she answered every one and named each reporter respectfully as she answered: and I thought “You Gangstah Gurl”. And while I’ve chosen not to vote this year, She has had my vote since the Maori Party and Labour fucked us up the ass. The reason for voting Green? Or for Metiria really … Simple.
She’s a strong brown woman. A strong brown woman who has experienced life – the chaos of life, not the tequila slammer by the poolside kind of life – and she brought that experience to politics, and didn’t lose who she was in the process.
Now that is extremely rare for any politician.
I don’t mean to disregard men or single fathers in the next part, but really I am lol and I won’t apologise for that. I am a woman, and have been a single mother on a benefit, so thats the reality i bring to my korero.
I think today, just quietly, all single mothers, that have struggled to make ends barely meet – have smiled at their kids and told them lunch is sorted, knowing dam well that it isn’t; have tried to figure out whats more important this week – power or school bus tickets; have starved while their kids are away with family, so they can pay for school uniforms and books; have sat up till 430am typing out bitch ass assignments to meet a deadline, knowing all the while their kids will be up soon, and you need to feed them on 4 weetbix, 1/2 cup of milk and 4 teaspoons of sugar and 2 apples, so they’re not hungry, till you get a fucking food grant to buy more food … after you’ve finished scrubbing some rich fuckwits toilets who may pay you an extra $20 under the table – and that’ll be dinner sorted … Yeah – All of them have quietly felt the choke of disempowerment as we’ve watched Metiria being circled by the media vultures and hoping she doesn’t have the life sucked out of her. Knowing that it’ll probably come down to a choice she shouldn’t have to make, but a choice single mothers make every single day.
But with her resignation came the collective grief of every activist, environmentalist, single mother, mothers, benefit recipients, working parents and tangata whenua. Because whether we like her or not, she represents everything that we are, are becoming, fighting for, striving to change and represent. And yet again, yes again, we watch as another strong brown woman has to chose between her career and protecting her family. She didn’t ass cover or protect her reputation but she still had to make a choice. And thats a kick in the fucking vulva we have all felt at one time or another.
And as every mother knows … protection of their babies, will win every time. Hands down.
I wonder though, what happens when all of the aforementioned disenfranchised pissed off souls, who had enough along time ago, have finally, collectively, all really had enough?
Is that the prelude to Revolution? History alludes to the fact that when you pull the proverbial rug out from under what is left of the already tired of fighting disenfranchised fucked off souls … Violent Change Occurs.
Just Saying.

The System Is A Vampire ~ Shapeshifter



in-same in-sane

sane is a 9 to 5

a house in the burbs

.2 kiddies



sane is also

waiting politely

in a que, that has no end

its filling in paperwork

when your

heart is giving way

its choosing the chocolate


because everyone else


so sane,

is same?



seems a tad



First Published on: Jun 5, 2016 @ 22:58 😉

that day

there comes a day

in everyones life

when rubber meets the road

when push comes to shove

when the ice is cracked

when the birds take flight

when the wind blows through your hair

when you let loose

fly free.

When your all
















First Published on: May 3, 2016 @ 10:07 😉


i’m beginning

to see

to understand

as i shed

the layers

that i once


that you still



as i was

and cannot


anything else.

which means

you are looking


what makes



not at what




First Published on: Apr 9, 2016 @ 14:20 ❤



So, apparently it’s not normal
To sleep

With a weapon
By the bed

I think it’s abnormal
Not to

Just saying


First Published on: Apr 2, 2016 @ 21:52 – and I still do this 🙂

me; on de sade?

In Criminology we were taught to only look at the research…the facts…and how ever we regurgitate those is really beside the point … the point is that some smart ass will debunk a theory, add to a theory, maybe make up a new theory. They’re all theories at the end of the day.

In Criminology we did very little research about de Sade … even though the term sadist and sadism was derived from his name. You could probably Google him and find out more than what we ever did.

Just as well my inclination for crime and criminals didn’t just stem from studying Criminology. Long before then, I was fascinated with criminal weirdos. My reading material therefore covered serial murderers, rapists, pedophiles, sadists and the like. Some of it was fanciful … Hannibal and the like … some based on historic facts … Gilles de Rais for example.

That my fascination was borne out of my own fucked up tragedy doesn’t really matter. I wanted to understand everything that there was to know about any type of perversion, or perceived perversion, I could think of.

Criminology didn’t give me my answers…as I’ve talked about before…I think it actually gave me more questions. And until recently I haven’t really questioned the ‘content’ of what we learned.

Marquis de Sade for example. Although sadism was derived from his name, and it was understood this was because of his proclivity for sex and violence. Hence sadomasochism. But a bit of a more in-depth look into this dude … brought on by the recent film ‘Quills’ … it turns out that the church (catholic) had more to do with his labelling as both violent and perverted. Now days I don’t think de Sades thoughts or proclivities would even rate a 3.5 on the perversion scale … although, his bent towards pedophilia leaves a bit more to be researched.

Anywho … it interested me that a dude that was an obvious artist and author … a dude who obviously enjoyed the written word … could be misinterpreted so badly (…research lacking re: pedophilia…I may completely change my mind!!) … but then we have generations of peeps who have been misunderstood and slammed by churches and men who are threatened by free thought and action…all under the guise of being ‘morally’ correct.

Sooooo….what was my rant about???? Ah, de Sade … I think he may have been given a raw deal … and i shall research further …. but he may have made my list of free thinking spirits to be admired for breaking ground and losing his life because of it.

Rock on de Sade 😉


First Published on: Mar 29, 2016 @ 13:10 🙂


it seems to me

that if conforming

was easier

my types

of peeps


wouldn’t do it


First Published on: Mar 13, 2016 @ 12:22 😉

that said

all I ever




was the same


as you


the freedom


to choose


make a choice


like you do



First Published on: Mar 2, 2016 @ 00:09 ❤