Image

moko & big dig big ups

before the month declined slightly, i didn’t get the chance to post the beginning of said month, & that it was awesome starting this gregorian year off with my eldest moko.

this year he’ll be 11 … eeek.

he’s so gorgeous & such a lovely kid.

i’d asked him what he wanted to do for ‘new years’ & he reckoned he wasn’t fussed … just staying awake was an achievement ! so we did pizza & the beach earlier in the evening & then watched everyone elses fireworks from the comfort of our backyard ;)

lame photo of the ‘fireworks’ i know. but let me just point out my achievement for  this night.

i haven’t ‘done’ fireworks displays for years & definitely haven’t gone out to take pics of any recently lol. yep, fireworks are all the usual pts(d) fuckery – loud, bright, random. this is the first year in fucking years i smiled @ them – hence the photo being shit lol.

so high-fucking-five me !

the following couple days before moko went home to his fams, he said he was missing his baby brother & told me all about how he got him up in the mornings & they’d have a chat (moko #9 is the newbie & he’s 4 months old) & then moko #1 would put bubba in his chair & turn on a specific cartoon for him, which apparently loves. i thought this was awesome & asked him why he does it. he says to me: so mama can have a sleep & cos i love him.

like i said, he’s a lovely kid.

anyway … the day before moko went home, we went to a ‘big dig’ – the purpose was to dig for 4 hours to hopefully find a plastic token & thusly win a corresponding prize.

he didn’t find anything & think he was over it within the first hour, but he persevered lol.

for me, it was a bit of a fucked up ‘achievement’. my beach was packed … & i mean packed (for our area anyways). not indicative of calm & tranquility, especially at this time of the year … but i sucked it up … well actually, breathed it out … & went down.

no-one but me really recognised the achievement, but oh well: you don’t always get a high five for the shit yah do ay.

have i mentioned i love my mokos?

they make life good xox


kpm ©


 

Image

photography .20

#moko #shutdown #macro #photography #kpm ©


kpm ©


 

SaveSave

Image

unfucked memory.

Karakia:

Atua

Tukua

Homai to Aroha

Ae.

Another ‘moko’ aka Grandbaby memory:

The Mokos (Grandchildren / Grandchild) Koro (Grandfather) (my partner) makes a cooked breakfast most mornings. Even though their parents would usually have given the mokos their usual breakfast / milk or whatever it was that was their norm; once ‘cooked breakfast’ arrived, each moko (except for 1 – Moko 3), would crawl up onto his lap whilst he was eating and starting poking around at his toast and baked beans, the sausages and bacon. He’s complain about them ‘eating all his breakfast’ and they’d sit happily on his lap eating away, till the plate was empty.

Mokos aged 9 and 8 still do they same thing, but without crawling up into his lap now. He’ll ask them if they want a cooked breakfast … they reply No … and then as he dishes up, they appear with: “Oh, Koro, can we have some baked beans …”, he rolls his eyes and dishes up extra plates of food.

What I really enjoyed this morning was the stories he told them of all the times they’d eaten up his breakfast, followed by the hysterical belly rolling laughter that followed. They sat and ate and laughed for nearly an hour.

I guess the important thing about growing up are the memories. For these darling Mokos, I really hope they embrace the memories and the laughter. Some of the most important things in this life.

<3


kpm ©


 

moko #2.

Like all the mokos, moko #2 is special … and being a nanny means I am completely biased … as I should be. However, what gets Me about moko #2, or little miss 8 now … is she’s a pain in the ass lol. What admire though is how she is able to ‘read the room’ (in her unique way) and figure out in minutes what a person’s vulnerability or sore point is. She generally can figure out what she needs to do to exploit that persons weakness to get what she wants. On its own, this ‘trait’ sounds kinda dodgy lol … but I realised one day, that this shit is what people train for when they go into sales … how to read a person and exploit their ‘weakness’ to get a sale.

Well miss moko has figured out how to do this all on her own ;)

Whats also interesting though, is she won’t exploit the ‘actual’ vulnerable.

We have a nephew who has severe CP, and miss 8 / moko #2, will spend hours playing quietly with him. This is a 2 fold thing for her though … 1. she’s able to hang out with the nephew and spend time with him and 2. when she wants quiet time, if she goes by him, no-one bugs her because ‘polite people’ can’t deal with a severely impaired CP nephew; so they leave them both alone. Now how freaking genius is that.

I admire that moko #2 is able to manage her; is able to get what she needs and what she wants; I admire that she pushes every and any boundary to adjust and find her own; I admire that she pisses people off so easily and isn’t terribly phased – cos you know how many years people sit in a councillors office trying to figure this shit ay!; I admire that she ‘sees’ people – their insides – their intent – long before the person can themselves.

Added to all this charm, moko #2 is an awesome little fashionista. She knows what she likes and how to put it together and she doesn’t give a rats ass what other people think or say … because there have been some rude bastards comment on how ‘she’s put together’, criticising her style. But she brushes it off like it aint no thing … and usually gives them a look of  … ‘what ever ; you obviously have no idea’ lol. Not once does she take any of that criticism on board!

I love miss moko #2 … I can’t wait to see what she does next ;)


kpm ©


 

moko #1.

Moko #1 will be 9 this year. What a little man he is :)

He’s taught Me so much about being a child … being who we are …

He rocks the boat most days and has questions for miles! And both of those things, I absolutely love about him. He has the questions that no-one asks, because its ‘improper’ to do so; he’s the one who is somehow able to put things into questions when we can’t quite figure out what the question is, that needs to be asked … he’s the one that challenges everything that would appear to be right or normal, and stretches the imagination and the perception … i.e.: “who made god then???” … he’s 9 :)

I was there at his birth … and remember well the overwhelming feeling of becoming a grandmother … and the sheer joy that also came with becoming a grandmother.

And I love being a grandmother :)

He has big brown eyes and a beautiful smile. I love his nature and his way; his talents and character.

He is part of Me. I am part of Him.

And I absolutely love him to bits xoxox


kpm ©


 

 

moko #4

This little human being, (moko #4) melts the heart. The youngest of the mokos at the moment, she has arrived at a time when I am more responsive as a Nan.

And theres a few things that I’ve really noticed about her … and Me.

She has no fear … no fear of being wrong, or right, of screaming what she wants, of doing her own thing. She, even at 2, is outspoken and demanding … she knows exactly what she wants and needs. And when she does become frightened, of a noise, or a stranger, or something she doesn’t understand … she is still able to demand what she needs … ‘I need comfort … a cuddle …’, whatever … she is able to articulate (verbally and non-verbally) that in no uncertain terms ;)

And as I watch her demand her space and freedom and her cuddles and anything else that she wants or needs … I see what I missed, but was always going on inside of Me.

I possess that same strength … it is just being ‘voiced’ exponentially ‘now’, making up for everything that never got to be expressed ‘then’.

Thats not a sad thing … thats a part of Me that I can do now … it’s also a part of Me that this little human being has inherited … and she will master it better than Me :)


kpm ©


 

Image

family fatigue ??

I have had the most amazing few days with my mokos and then last night with my daughters. They’re so beautiful … yes I am slightly biased though.

Up until this particular round of moko madness, I’ve found having them stay for longer than 24 hours, hugely challenging. Not just because these two are ‘miss nearly 3’ and ‘miss just turned 7’ and talk and ask ‘why’ incessantly … not at all LOL … but because I usually get fatigued, then overwhelmed by the noise, then frustrated, then sad, then feel them guilts, then back to fatigued … yes PTSD can be a bitch.

What I noticed quite dramatically this time though, was the lack of all those things! And in the moments that those things started to raise their ugly heads, I was able to manage them. I breathed, I ‘grounded’, I slowed down, I articulated what I needed, I made sure I got what I needed … I made sure they understood what was happening. It made the whole experience completely fucken awesome!

That corner that I rounded without really realising it … well it’s pretty bloody cool.

And as I sat up till 430am, and gas bagged with my daughters … ate chocolate … YUM … and watched cheesy funny movies … I loved every minute of it! I loved them … I loved feeling a new sense of freedom and relief.

Ahhhhh … *happy sigh*


kpm ©


 

photography & art @kpm-artist SaveSave

SaveSave