beer and burgers and the weekend that was

A bit overdue I know … but I’ve been processing. Gotta love the processing part lol.

As Friday night closed and Saturday morning rolled around, I ended up more stressed than anxious I think. To most, they may seem like the same thing – To Me they are distinctly different. Stress, of the mundane kind, I can deal with but it makes Me butt ugly angry. So if anything, I call it being pissed off; those looking on, call it ‘over dramatised stress’. So really thats got more to do with them, than Me. And anxiety, for Me, is the pre requisite for a panic attack. The distinct difference, is the latter is a debilitating ass wipe that leaves Me feeling vulnerable, not angry.

Angry gets shit done.

Vulnerable leaves you debilitated.

So, rolling with stressed on Saturday morning, I’m asking the partner (because this is his soirée) …

‘so, what time is everyone coming?’ … ‘dunno’ …

‘what time did you tell people to come?’ … ‘saturday’ …

Oh my fuck! And thats how most of the day rolled out.

Now I’ve come to grips with the partner being as he is. A man. He doesn’t plan like Me; he doesn’t organise, anything – and he definitely doesn’t do time frames. He actually adds to the anxiety that is Me, but I’ve also learnt a lot from him … I’ve had too otherwise I’d be fucking insaner than I already am!

So 12 o’clock rolls by, as does 1 … and I’m hungry as fuck lol.

‘Dear … can we make some food?’ … ‘Um … I haven’t got any buns … they’re coming’

WTF? LOL.

So peeps start arriving at this point and there isn’t any food.

“Learning Moment” … I pulled the partner aside and ever so gently said to him …

“Do you have a Plan B sweetheart?” … ‘Nope’ … “So this is where, as anal as I am, I would have a Plan B”. He looks at Me a little astounded and says, “Ok, so if I was to have a Plan B, what do you suggest that should be?” …

Oh my fuck, is all I’m thinking.

“Plan B would have been purchasing some spare buns and having them in the cupboard. It would be buying more than 1 lettuce to feed 25 people … so maybe 4 or 5 … and then the rest of the salad ingredients … Plan B would be ensuring I had all the meat patties here and ready to go.”

“Ohhhhh” … says Partner … “That sounds good”.

*groan*

And while that conversation right there pretty much sums up the whole day: I must say, I coped pretty fucking gangstah-ly with the whole thing!

The family came – landed – caused chaos – and departed. And I watched, slightly interacted, and felt reasonably unaffected.

The friends came – landed – settled in – caused abit of chaos – and departed. And again, I watched, slightly interacted where I wanted too, and felt reasonably unaffected.

What I found super duper interesting, is whilst I was ‘Managing Myself’, quite a few of those around Me found that -how would you put it – threatening?!. They wanted Me to engage in their incessant grizzling; they wanted Me to ‘put shoes on’; they wanted Me to drink; the wanted Me to eat more. And as I said No, or thank you – No thank you … they squirmed something awful. It made them feel enormously uncomfortable. And usually that discomfort effects Me, as in it makes Me feel anxious. But not this time.

I was able to see what was happening, and more importantly, see that it wasn’t my problem at all 🙂

So as the night wore on I ended up being one of the last ones awake. There were a few hard cores that stayed up and drank themselves into a stupor. But all in all, I enjoyed my night. And so did my partner!

What I was mostest proudest of for him and Me, is we both managed ourselves; did our thang, separately and individually … but we both allowed each other to do Us. It was quite liberating for the both of Us 😉 I think he enjoyed not having to ‘babysit’ Me. He’s figured out that I am capable of managing myself, its just other people that don’t like how I do that, but thats not his problem – Or Mine 🙂

There was an ‘incident’, of which I am still processing – whereby a friend took offence to another friends manner. As I have been told – the 2nd friend was hitting on the first friends husband.

What I found most interesting, again … is while I’m pretty good at picking up whats going on around Me; somehow, I completely missed this!

My daughter said to Me later, that I hadn’t picked it up because I’m ‘not like that’. I didn’t, and still don’t, understand, what that means. But she says I don’t do drama therefore hadn’t picked up on what I guess I deemed to be, un-necessary drama. I was a bit distraught that our mate had been offended and felt uncomfortable by the whole situation – but it did leave Me wondering – If that was a flirtatious encounter that was witnessed by everyone around Me, then it wasn’t very good!

Needless to say – I don’t have a romantic or flirtatious bone in my body 😉

So, all in all, a good weekend … many burgers consumed (finally), and many beers had … and for Me, survival skills employed succinctly! I think I’m looking forward to the next event, which is fucking amazing for Me !

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artivism ~ deconstruction

analysis
əˈnalɪsɪs/
detailed examination of the elements or structure of something.
 .
deconstruction
diːk(ə)nˈstrʌkʃ(ə)n/
a method of critical analysis of philosophical and literary language which emphasizes the internal workings of language and conceptual systems, the relational quality of meaning, and the assumptions implicit in forms of expression.
.
Depending on how you look at something, the view will always be different. Depending on who is doing the looking, the view will also always be different.
The art of dismantling something so that you can see it from a different perspective, is analysis and deconstruction.
In art terms, it works just the same way.
You start with something reasonably mundane.
Like a washing machine.
And you strip it down to its larger parts.
Then you take those larger parts and dismantle them further.
You view them from different angles.
It always looks different depending on where your looking ‘from’.
And it looks bigger or smaller, depending on how much you’re focussing on it and fading out whats around it.
I love this perspective. The ability to see something in it’s totality –
And then in its totality as an ‘individual’ thing.
Being able to appreciate the function of ‘items’:
And then the uniqueness and beauty of the intricacies of each of those parts.
And depending on where you’re looking, you’ll see beauty in the most unusual places.
And this is how I view my world;
And the world around Me.

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what #NoDAPL said that isn’t said

The Dakota Access Pipeline is projected to extend 1,134 miles and connect the Bakken and Three Forks production areas in North Dakota to Patoka, Illinois. The DAPL is designed to transport 450,000 barrels of crude oil per day along this route, and it will cross the Missouri River less than a mile away from the Standing Rock Reservation.” 

Although it wasn’t covered by mainstream media to begin with, the peaceful protest started by Standing Rock Sioux Tribe was eventually covered by all media. Eventually known as ‘water protectors’, these righteous people fought long and hard (and continue too) to protect the environment and their right to water.

The process and ‘protest’ that ensued was been nothing short of a re-hash of history in relation to the continued breach of rights and ‘insights’ of Tangata Whenua. The treatment of both the rights of the people and the environment were publicly butchered throughout the process.

Excerpt taken from http://www.theearthchild.co.za:

“Native Americans say the pipeline threatens sacred sites and drinking water resources, and that no meaningful consultation took place. The Army Corps of Engineers disagrees. During the court hearing, the agency said the tribe declined to be part of the process. The tribe in turn said they didn’t want to legitimize a flawed process. The company building the pipeline, DakotaAccess, says the project is safe and will benefit the region and boost energy independence. They have, however, agreed to stop construction in that area of North Dakota until the court rules on the injunction.” 

Interesting to note, for Me, is this:

The beginning of this excerpt says: ‘Native Americans say … ‘. For Me, what else is there to discuss? The Americas was their land to begin with. Yes, we have all been taught that the ‘Indians’ were savages, uncivilised and war mongering peoples. We were taught that they didn’t ‘utilise’ their lands therefore it was alright to steal it from them, slaughter them and make ‘america great’ in the process. It is the same genocide the colonial mentality has been employing for eons throughout the ‘colonies’.

Moving forward to this moment, they are now ‘quarantined’ to a minuscule amount of land, and that is again, as always, being threatened; as are they. The rest of the excerpt screams imbalance and ethnocentrism and doesn’t begin to scratch the surface of colonial failure toward the Indigenous of the Americas, not to mention the preceding ‘experimental’ environmental fuck ups under the colonial belt.

The brilliance of the Indigenous however, is we have all learnt to be ‘bilingual’ and ‘bicultural’. We understand how to walk their walk and their talk their talk. We adjust.

The savagery of the colonial / crown / government / corporation mentality; is they still don’t give a fuck. They do what they do for their own greed and to hell with whoever and whatever gets in the way of that profit.

 

So, really, what was all the fuss about? It was just a pipe line. It creates economy and will benefit everyone … Right?

Wrong.

This is what it comes down too:

A. Government Corporation and Private Enterprise do not have a great track record when it comes to taking care of the environment.

B. Government Corporation and Private Enterprise do not have a great track record when it comes to the preservation of culture, language and identity.

And why does the latter even matter?

Because for Indigenous, their culture, language and identity is all about the earth, environment and nature. No-one preserves this better than Indigenous. No-one has better foresight and motivation for care than Indigenous. Native Americans are not asking for anything different than what the rest of the world should be asking for. That there is a reassurance of clean water now and in the future!.

Basically, that we NOT fuck up the environment any further, for profit or for any other reason. It does not take a genius to figure out what is more important. It does however, take the Indigenous to point out and make a stand for the obvious!

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I’m Not sure if I would call the Cops. My Skin is too Dark.

A brilliant article on ‘Afrophobia’ and its intricacies.
Quote ~ “Afrophobia is the irrational fear of black people…”

For More visit https://afrosapiophile.com

AfroSapiophile

Too Many Murderous Cops Go Free

On the 6th of July, 2016, A police officer murdered Philando Castile.  Jeronimo Yanez, the police officer who committed the murder, was acquitted of all charges on the 16th of June, 2017.

Yanez Shooting Castile

The fact that Castile’s murder was video recorded live on Facebook, with clear audio where you can hear this poor man moaning towards his death, didn’t matter.  The child in the back seat, didn’t matter.  The fact that he volunteered information that he is a licensed gun owner, didn’t matter.  A woman driving the car, didn’t matter.  Castile being in the passenger seat, didn’t matter.  Seemingly, the only reason why the family was pulled over, was because someone had, by the cop’s description, a “wide set nose”.

“The victim did everything right, everything he was supposed to do.  The victim was very respectful, very polite, letting the officer know what he was…

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mauri of me #25 ~ moko #3

Like all the mokos, moko #3 is special … and being a nanny means I am completely biased … as I should be. However, what gets Me about moko #3, or little miss 8 now … is she’s a pain in the ass lol. What admire though is how she is able to ‘read the room’ (in her unique way) and figure out in minutes what a person’s vulnerability or sore point is. She generally can figure out what she needs to do to exploit that persons weakness to get what she wants. On its own, this ‘trait’ sounds kinda dodgy lol … but I realised one day, that this shit is what people train for when they go into sales … how to read a person and exploit their ‘weakness’ to get a sale.

Well miss moko has figured out how to do this all on her own 😉

Whats also interesting though, is she won’t exploit the ‘actual’ vulnerable.

We have a nephew who has severe CP, and miss 8 / moko #3, will spend hours playing quietly with him. This is a 2 fold thing for her though … 1. she’s able to hang out with the nephew and spend time with him and 2. when she wants quiet time, if she goes by him, no-one bugs her because ‘polite people’ can’t deal with a severely impaired CP nephew; so they leave them both alone. Now how freaking genius is that.

I admire that moko #3 is able to manage her; is able to get what she needs and what she wants; I admire that she pushes every and any boundary to adjust and find her own; I admire that she pisses people off so easily and isn’t terribly phased – cos you know how many years people sit in a councillors office trying to figure this shit ay!; I admire that she ‘sees’ people – their insides – their intent – long before the person can themselves.

Added to all this charm, moko #3 is an awesome little fashionista. She knows what she likes and how to put it together and she doesn’t give a rats ass what other people think or say … because there have been some rude bastards comment on how ‘she’s put together’, criticising her style. But she brushes it off like it aint no thing … and usually gives them a look of  … ‘what ever ; you obviously have no idea’ lol. Not once does she take any of that criticism on board!

I love miss moko #3 … I can’t wait to see what she does next 😉