reconciling the hormones #86

& que the hormone fuckery.

right on time.


kpm©


 

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reconciling the hormones #84

it feels like my uterus is making its way up my spine, then

decides against that,

turns round & heads back toward my asshole.

just to linger there, pulsating,

& torturing my insides with contraction like pains.

great.

i was looking forward to this bastard showing up.


not.


kpm©


 

reconciling the hormones #83

the goddesses heard my plea.

and we’re steady … ish,

thank fuck!


 

reconciling the hormones #82

Savethey’re a brewing


*please goddesses: go easy ay*


 

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reconciling the hormones #79

and we have happy hormones!


‘celebrating the little things’

:)


 

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reconciling the hormones #78

All over the dam place.


Thats an apt description of what those little bastards are doing.

The other day I kinda felt like I was getting a wholesome grip on the whole transitional menopausal thing, and feeling slightly grateful for the hormones that are part of my biology. Yah know, the ones that make my uterus shed its fucking lining each month and make Me want to impale someone/s to the nearest tree.

But today I’ve gone from cool and calm to tearful and fucking agitated … to clarity and organised … back to tearful and agitated.

Whilst the period is coming to a close, my insides are still uncomfortable and the anxiety is peaking and dissipating as fast as I can say ‘fuck it all’.

And I am breathing … well trying … and reminding myself that being a biological woman is a beautiful thing … and hey, you’re about to be a Nan again! ‘Your legacy is about to grow again …’ and that couldn’t happen without the assistance of your uterus … blah blah.

And breathing.

Oh my fuck.

Biological womanhood aint all it’s cracked up to be ;)


photography & art @kpm-artist 


 

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reconciling the hormones #77

So, the happy hormones are slowly settling into a nice little groove.

Ok, so ‘nice groove’ is an optimistic term; one that I hope will turn into a ‘actual reality’!

I’m kinda getting used to what is a hormonal fluctuation and what isn’t lol. And the best way to describe it, is it’s like being pregnant and having your period all at once.

I can cry at the drop of a hat, at not much in particular … and then be overwhelmed by rage the next second. My already broken ‘filter’ becomes even more of a menace and my thoughts can go from crystal clear to an absolute scrabbled egg!

So much Fun … *groan*

So aside from the emotions, the physical side of things means my waist line is getting lost (in reality its been kinda lost since the mid-2000s *extra groan*), the facial hair does whatever the fuck it wants, the boobs are heading south even more than they were, and my uterus feels like its crawling outta my vag every other day.

Awesome.

The only difficulty here, is discerning what is just ‘ageing’ and what is purely hormonal and will hopefully pass as 50 something comes and goes … farkkkssakes lol.

All in all though, I think I’m doing Ok. I know when to hit the floor and do a bit of yoga … I know when I need 2 ice packs instead of one, and I know when I should probably just have a nap instead of posting on facebook lol.

So this will be my last hormonal type post for awhile … if not forever.

I might update when the periods stop completely … Yuss!

Love and light to y’all my menstruating / menopausing peoples … Mwah!


from pts(d) expression series #138 – Mar 6, 2017 @ 08:02

Fin.