After my usual expel-lations, ablutions and logging ins, in the morning, I have another little routine.
I do the rounds.
I check to see if my mama is awake to tell her I love her and I hope she has a lovely day.
I check to see if my babies are alright.
I wave to my neighbour Jim.
I check in on Kara to make sure she hasn’t damaged herself or another(s) ;)
I check AJ to make sure her world is alright <3
Then Me and my coffee peruse ‘the news’. I try and make that as balanced as possible, depending on my mood.
Sounds well socialised and friendly doesn’t it – although it’s all done online.
This is my new Normal.
This is my ‘freedom’ and contact with the ‘outside’ world.
In the ‘old normal’ I’d be called a recluse. But I’m aight with that now. In fact I tend to embrace that bitch now.
This is Me doing Me the best way I am able, with what I have.
Does it piss Me off that my partner can jump in the car and take off for a 24 hour catch up with his mates? Does it piss Me off that an event I’d like to go to takes 3 weeks to prepare for and usually ends up more work than its worth; thusly cancelling likeable event? Does it annoy the living fuck out of Me that the eye ball roll I get when I ask if we can go for a drive to get an ice-cream is enough to put Me off going all together? Does it piss my fucking edges that I am A Lone most of the time and that sometimes, just sometimes, I want a friend like Minnie from “The Help”?
No. Not at all.
I am what I am For Now. That may change tomorrow or not at all.
Today I am grateful for the friendships I have, the internet, my coffee supply, my reading glasses, the 2 minutes of rain we had and my pyjamas.